Chapter 20 -- The Colors of Night
Author's Note and Warning: We are now back into hard R to NC-17 territory for sex. You have been warned
It's a strange day
No colours or shapes
No sound in my head
I forget who I am
When I'm with you
There's no reason
There's no sense
I'm not supposed
To feel
I forget who I am
I forget...
Goldfrapp - Utopia
Chapter 20 -- The Colors of Night
Mara stood by the window looking out into the semi-darkness that was night in Chicago. She couldn't tell if the sky was overcast any more, the ambient light of the city made it impossible to pick out any stars. It was strange to see the night thus denuded of stars. There was no moon in site.
She felt Rafe's hand on her shoulder. "Come on, Mara. It's time for bed, such as it is," he chuckled.
"Look at the night. I forget how..."
"You forget how?"
"How many stars are out there. Makes me realize why violence is such an easy thing in the city. There's nothing out there besides other people to tell you how small you are. And from people, all you get is small. You lose the feeling of being a small part of something so much bigger, bigger than you can even comprehend. Just being people-small is degrading to those who have been made small. Being a mote in the universe, that is being a small part of something incredible. And everyone around you is part of something incredible. So why would you hurt anything...so amazing?"
"She's an editor and a philosopher. Has the city always made you feel small?"
"Yes. It's overwhelming. It's a gift and a curse that you can disappear into."
"A gift and a curse?"
"Never mind, I'm just...wishing I could see some stars tonight."
Rafe put his arm around her and led her to their makeshift sleeping bag bed. "I'm going to take a chance and be a small part of something incredible. It gives me courage somehow, that even if I cease to exist..."
"Don't say that!"
"We all...stop someday. For some it's just sooner rather than later. Anyway, from to the sublime to the ridiculous. This has given me to take off my shoes, for tonight anyway. I hope you'll join me? He toed off his shoes and crawled into the double sleeping bag, leaving the side with the pillow for Mara.
"You are such a gentleman, but I don't need a pillow, when I can rest my head on your shoulder...if you don't mind and it won't hurt you..." she trailed off uncertainly.
"Get in bed, woman," he mock-growled at her.
She got in, but made sure he had the pillow first. She compromised and used her backpack as a pillow.
Closing her eyes to the darkness around her, she took a deep breath. She could smell Rafe, who smelled surprisingly un-rank after being cooped up in less than hospitable circumstances for several days. She commented on it, "You smell good."
"Hah!"
"You do. Here, I'll prove it." She slid closer and sniffed his shoulder. "Not bad considering."
"I do have access to a bathroom, you know," he said, slightly miffed. "What I don't have access to is clean clothes."
"You want to take them off? Let them air out overnight?"
"I don't know if that would be smart..."
"You know me. I'll probably wake up at the crap, er I mean, crack of dawn, especially with the big window facing northeast."
"You're just trying to get me naked."
"Rafe, I'm not trying to seduce you."
"Hah!"
"Okay, maybe a little."
"So explain to me, Ms. Pitts, just how do you seduce someone just a little?"
"Like this." She propped herself up on one elbow and brushed a strand of hair off his face. She leaned in and kissed him on the forehead, then on his good eye and ever so gently, his blackened eye. "I love this nose," she murmured, kissing the bridge and then the tip of it.
Slowly she moved in and lightly kissed his mouth. Then she lay back down. "That's how I seduce someone a little."
"Nope, overshot 'a little' by a large margin into 'a lot.' Your simplest touch..." he paused. He brought her hand up to his mouth and began planting lingering kisses on it. When he sucked one finger into his mouth, Mara shivered with the sensation that shot through her whole body from that simple touch.
"You're cold?" he asked. "Get closer Mara, I promise I won't bite...unless you ask me very nicely."
She softly laughed, a husky sound that let him know how much his attentions to her hand had moved her.
"Come closer," he murmured again.
She slid right next to him, and he put his arm behind her head. They were so close that their entire sides, from ribcage on down were touching.
"It's nice to have someone else churning out the body heat in this joint besides me," he whispered in her ear, then kissed it. She sighed and rolled to put her arm around his waist.
"Ah, ah, ah," he warned, and took her arm and turned her back flat on her stomach. "If you're hugging me, I can't touch you like I want to."
"How...do you want to touch me?"
"Like this." Rafe stroked her face and trailed down her neck, to her collar bone. He rolled toward her and slipped open the top button of her blouse. "And this," as he kissed the skin at the top of her sternum. "And this" Slipping a couple more buttons opened, he kissed between her breasts.
Mara felt her breathing speed up. Such simple touches, and yet she was turning into a warm limbless puddle at the hands and lips of this man.
Rafe untucked and unbuttoned the rest of her shirt. He was delighted to see that she was wearing a pretty, lacy front-clasp bra. Undoing the clasp, he cradled her right breast with one hand. He ran a thumbnail lightly over the nipple.
She didn't know if it was the situation they were in, or her relief to know that he felt something for her, but she had never been turned on by a touch so quickly. She arched her back up, pressing her breast into his hand.
He ran his tongue around the nipple of her other breast, then drew back, causing her to gasp and arch toward him.
"Oh, god, Rafe," she sighed and tangled her hand in his hair when he dipped back down to caress her breast with his tongue again. He suckled the nipple more firmly and she arched up toward him again. "God, Rafe. We've got...to stop. This isn't a..." he cut off her protest by kissing her.
His hand worked its way down her waist and around to the front, until it found the snap to her jeans. He unsnapped them, then his hand wandered back up again, to fondle her breasts, alternating between them, as he continued his compelling kiss.
They broke off when both felt the need to draw a breath. She undulated toward his hand, silently begging for more attention to her breast. He drew the nipple of the other breast into his mouth, this time. His wandering hand made its way down to the front of her jeans, unzipping them.
Slowly, so slowly, that she would have berated him for his slowness had the circumstances been different, his hand slid into her underwear. His middle finger found her cleft and slid in, searching for her clitoris.
He rubbed the one finger up and down, slower than she could bear, as she writhed under his hand. She groaned as he slid that one finger into her vagina and let it rest there, his thumb just in contact with her nub. Her hips bucked up toward his hand. He left it there, unmoving.
"God, Rafe, do something, I'm, I'm dying here."
"You're looking for the little death?" he asked lifting his mouth from her breast. His breath on her damp nipple made her shiver. She reached her hand towards his to try to get him to move. "Don't," he stopped her with a word.
Mara lay her hand back down beside her, where it clutched at the sleeping bag as he stroked her leisurely, apparently in no hurry. He slid two fingers into her, then a third, and she gasped at the full feeling. "Too much," she gasped. He slid his fingers out, but reinserted his index and ring finger into her, his thumb still stroking her nub.
"Let me...guess," she panted, "You played piano...when you...were.. a kid... a veritable...prodigy...with your...hands aaauaghh. She groaned out as she felt the beginnings of her orgasm.
He felt her muscles clench his fingers and he slid them out of her, teasing her nether lips, but not quite ever touching her where she most wanted to be touch.
"You...tease! Please..."
"Please, what?"
"Please, just please."
"Please what, Mara. I want to hear you say it. Your voice is so sexy when you're aroused. I want to hear you tell me. Tell me. Just. What. You. Want."
She blushed furiously at his request, but breathed out, "Please, please put your fingers in me, in my vagina. Oh!"
"Okay, now what else would you like me to do? Do stop moving your hips around, if you can," he dared her. She could see his wicked smile glint at her in the city-lit twilight.
Mara let out a half-groan, half sigh as she tried to stop her hips from moving. She almost succeeded, except for the persistent tremors of pleasure that ran through her whole body, starting from where Rafe's hand rested.
"Well?" he prompted.
"Please...rub my clitoris...with your thumb..likebefore, ohgodyes..."
"Since you asked so nicely I could hardly refuse, now could I?" He started plunging his fingers in and out of her.
She shuddered and shuddered, no longer able to keep her hips still. He pressed and circled her nub more firmly. She opened her mouth and gasped out, "Rafe, love you. Her gasp turned into a keen of pleasure. He covered her mouth with his to keep her cry from sounding very loudly in the room, as he felt her internal muscles spasm strongly and rhythmically against his fingers.
Rafe lightened his touch on her clitoris, but kept a steady pressure on it, prolonging her orgasm. When she calmed to mere tremulousness, he pulled her close, holding her, feeling her body vibrate with the aftershocks of pleasure.
Mara felt as limp as a very cooked noodle, as she caught her breath in Rafe's arms. She angled her head upward and lightly nipped his earlobe. "So do I get to return the pleasure?" she breathed into his ear.
She felt rather than heard his sigh of pleasure. "I hope you do feel...up...to it, you were so...inspiring just now," she husked into his ear.
"Hell, woman. Are you trying to kill me?" he murmured under his breath.
"What was it you were saying about little deaths?" she asked as she pushed him back on his back.
"If you're going to do anything, do it quickly. You falling apart was such a turn on, well, these jeans aren't very comfortable right now."
"Let's see what we can do about that." she sat up and undid his belt and opened the button and fly of his jeans. Running her hand over his erection, she laughed a little, "What. No silk boxers today, just tighty-whities? Not that I'm complaining. Here." She tugged at the waistbands of his jeans and underwear. "Let's just slide these out of the way."
Rafe lifted his hips, flinching a bit at the strain on his ribs, but he wasn't going to stop her now. Not when she had such a determined...interested...gleam in her eye. He wanted to feel her lovely warm mouth around him. He helped her guide his underwear down over his erection.
She slid his jeans down, just past his buttocks. "Now. It's your turn to...hold...still." She pinned his hips down with her hands and licked the underside of his cock, using her full tongue firmly against it. He groaned in response.
Surprising him, she suddenly slid her mouth down over his penis, slowly sliding it in further as she relaxed her throat muscles. He shuddered with pleasure as she took him all the way in.
She slowly, painstakingly moved her mouth up and down on his cock. One hand stilled his hips, and the other went down to fondle his balls, running her fingernails gently over his flesh. His hips jerked and she lifted her mouth off of him. "Ah, ah. What did I ask you to do? Let's see if you can hold your hips still, Mr. Moretti."
Leaning back over him, she enveloped him with her mouth. His hand found her hair and tangled up in it stroking her head as she sucked on him. His eyes rolled back in his head at the sensations she was evoking.
She sped up her attentions and he found he could no longer keep his hips still. He bucked up to meet her mouth as she went down on him. The hand that was torturously fondling his balls snuck a finger behind them and rubbed his perineum, stimulating him further.
He groaned quietly as his thrusting quickened and became uneven. She could feel his balls start to tighten up, and became more vigorous in her licking and sucking. Another long, sotto voce groan sigh came from Rafe as he spent in her mouth. She swallowed and kept licking and sucking at him as he shuddered beneath her.
Pulling up the covers over them both, she put her head on his shoulder and listen to him catch his breath. "Now, I'd say it's bedtime for Mr. Moretti."
"Amen," Mr. Moretti responded on a long sigh.
Soon, they fell asleep, huddled closely together, half unclothed.
It's a strange day
No colours or shapes
No sound in my head
I forget who I am
When I'm with you
There's no reason
There's no sense
I'm not supposed
To feel
I forget who I am
I forget...
Goldfrapp - Utopia
Chapter 20 -- The Colors of Night
Mara stood by the window looking out into the semi-darkness that was night in Chicago. She couldn't tell if the sky was overcast any more, the ambient light of the city made it impossible to pick out any stars. It was strange to see the night thus denuded of stars. There was no moon in site.
She felt Rafe's hand on her shoulder. "Come on, Mara. It's time for bed, such as it is," he chuckled.
"Look at the night. I forget how..."
"You forget how?"
"How many stars are out there. Makes me realize why violence is such an easy thing in the city. There's nothing out there besides other people to tell you how small you are. And from people, all you get is small. You lose the feeling of being a small part of something so much bigger, bigger than you can even comprehend. Just being people-small is degrading to those who have been made small. Being a mote in the universe, that is being a small part of something incredible. And everyone around you is part of something incredible. So why would you hurt anything...so amazing?"
"She's an editor and a philosopher. Has the city always made you feel small?"
"Yes. It's overwhelming. It's a gift and a curse that you can disappear into."
"A gift and a curse?"
"Never mind, I'm just...wishing I could see some stars tonight."
Rafe put his arm around her and led her to their makeshift sleeping bag bed. "I'm going to take a chance and be a small part of something incredible. It gives me courage somehow, that even if I cease to exist..."
"Don't say that!"
"We all...stop someday. For some it's just sooner rather than later. Anyway, from to the sublime to the ridiculous. This has given me to take off my shoes, for tonight anyway. I hope you'll join me? He toed off his shoes and crawled into the double sleeping bag, leaving the side with the pillow for Mara.
"You are such a gentleman, but I don't need a pillow, when I can rest my head on your shoulder...if you don't mind and it won't hurt you..." she trailed off uncertainly.
"Get in bed, woman," he mock-growled at her.
She got in, but made sure he had the pillow first. She compromised and used her backpack as a pillow.
Closing her eyes to the darkness around her, she took a deep breath. She could smell Rafe, who smelled surprisingly un-rank after being cooped up in less than hospitable circumstances for several days. She commented on it, "You smell good."
"Hah!"
"You do. Here, I'll prove it." She slid closer and sniffed his shoulder. "Not bad considering."
"I do have access to a bathroom, you know," he said, slightly miffed. "What I don't have access to is clean clothes."
"You want to take them off? Let them air out overnight?"
"I don't know if that would be smart..."
"You know me. I'll probably wake up at the crap, er I mean, crack of dawn, especially with the big window facing northeast."
"You're just trying to get me naked."
"Rafe, I'm not trying to seduce you."
"Hah!"
"Okay, maybe a little."
"So explain to me, Ms. Pitts, just how do you seduce someone just a little?"
"Like this." She propped herself up on one elbow and brushed a strand of hair off his face. She leaned in and kissed him on the forehead, then on his good eye and ever so gently, his blackened eye. "I love this nose," she murmured, kissing the bridge and then the tip of it.
Slowly she moved in and lightly kissed his mouth. Then she lay back down. "That's how I seduce someone a little."
"Nope, overshot 'a little' by a large margin into 'a lot.' Your simplest touch..." he paused. He brought her hand up to his mouth and began planting lingering kisses on it. When he sucked one finger into his mouth, Mara shivered with the sensation that shot through her whole body from that simple touch.
"You're cold?" he asked. "Get closer Mara, I promise I won't bite...unless you ask me very nicely."
She softly laughed, a husky sound that let him know how much his attentions to her hand had moved her.
"Come closer," he murmured again.
She slid right next to him, and he put his arm behind her head. They were so close that their entire sides, from ribcage on down were touching.
"It's nice to have someone else churning out the body heat in this joint besides me," he whispered in her ear, then kissed it. She sighed and rolled to put her arm around his waist.
"Ah, ah, ah," he warned, and took her arm and turned her back flat on her stomach. "If you're hugging me, I can't touch you like I want to."
"How...do you want to touch me?"
"Like this." Rafe stroked her face and trailed down her neck, to her collar bone. He rolled toward her and slipped open the top button of her blouse. "And this," as he kissed the skin at the top of her sternum. "And this" Slipping a couple more buttons opened, he kissed between her breasts.
Mara felt her breathing speed up. Such simple touches, and yet she was turning into a warm limbless puddle at the hands and lips of this man.
Rafe untucked and unbuttoned the rest of her shirt. He was delighted to see that she was wearing a pretty, lacy front-clasp bra. Undoing the clasp, he cradled her right breast with one hand. He ran a thumbnail lightly over the nipple.
She didn't know if it was the situation they were in, or her relief to know that he felt something for her, but she had never been turned on by a touch so quickly. She arched her back up, pressing her breast into his hand.
He ran his tongue around the nipple of her other breast, then drew back, causing her to gasp and arch toward him.
"Oh, god, Rafe," she sighed and tangled her hand in his hair when he dipped back down to caress her breast with his tongue again. He suckled the nipple more firmly and she arched up toward him again. "God, Rafe. We've got...to stop. This isn't a..." he cut off her protest by kissing her.
His hand worked its way down her waist and around to the front, until it found the snap to her jeans. He unsnapped them, then his hand wandered back up again, to fondle her breasts, alternating between them, as he continued his compelling kiss.
They broke off when both felt the need to draw a breath. She undulated toward his hand, silently begging for more attention to her breast. He drew the nipple of the other breast into his mouth, this time. His wandering hand made its way down to the front of her jeans, unzipping them.
Slowly, so slowly, that she would have berated him for his slowness had the circumstances been different, his hand slid into her underwear. His middle finger found her cleft and slid in, searching for her clitoris.
He rubbed the one finger up and down, slower than she could bear, as she writhed under his hand. She groaned as he slid that one finger into her vagina and let it rest there, his thumb just in contact with her nub. Her hips bucked up toward his hand. He left it there, unmoving.
"God, Rafe, do something, I'm, I'm dying here."
"You're looking for the little death?" he asked lifting his mouth from her breast. His breath on her damp nipple made her shiver. She reached her hand towards his to try to get him to move. "Don't," he stopped her with a word.
Mara lay her hand back down beside her, where it clutched at the sleeping bag as he stroked her leisurely, apparently in no hurry. He slid two fingers into her, then a third, and she gasped at the full feeling. "Too much," she gasped. He slid his fingers out, but reinserted his index and ring finger into her, his thumb still stroking her nub.
"Let me...guess," she panted, "You played piano...when you...were.. a kid... a veritable...prodigy...with your...hands aaauaghh. She groaned out as she felt the beginnings of her orgasm.
He felt her muscles clench his fingers and he slid them out of her, teasing her nether lips, but not quite ever touching her where she most wanted to be touch.
"You...tease! Please..."
"Please, what?"
"Please, just please."
"Please what, Mara. I want to hear you say it. Your voice is so sexy when you're aroused. I want to hear you tell me. Tell me. Just. What. You. Want."
She blushed furiously at his request, but breathed out, "Please, please put your fingers in me, in my vagina. Oh!"
"Okay, now what else would you like me to do? Do stop moving your hips around, if you can," he dared her. She could see his wicked smile glint at her in the city-lit twilight.
Mara let out a half-groan, half sigh as she tried to stop her hips from moving. She almost succeeded, except for the persistent tremors of pleasure that ran through her whole body, starting from where Rafe's hand rested.
"Well?" he prompted.
"Please...rub my clitoris...with your thumb..likebefore, ohgodyes..."
"Since you asked so nicely I could hardly refuse, now could I?" He started plunging his fingers in and out of her.
She shuddered and shuddered, no longer able to keep her hips still. He pressed and circled her nub more firmly. She opened her mouth and gasped out, "Rafe, love you. Her gasp turned into a keen of pleasure. He covered her mouth with his to keep her cry from sounding very loudly in the room, as he felt her internal muscles spasm strongly and rhythmically against his fingers.
Rafe lightened his touch on her clitoris, but kept a steady pressure on it, prolonging her orgasm. When she calmed to mere tremulousness, he pulled her close, holding her, feeling her body vibrate with the aftershocks of pleasure.
Mara felt as limp as a very cooked noodle, as she caught her breath in Rafe's arms. She angled her head upward and lightly nipped his earlobe. "So do I get to return the pleasure?" she breathed into his ear.
She felt rather than heard his sigh of pleasure. "I hope you do feel...up...to it, you were so...inspiring just now," she husked into his ear.
"Hell, woman. Are you trying to kill me?" he murmured under his breath.
"What was it you were saying about little deaths?" she asked as she pushed him back on his back.
"If you're going to do anything, do it quickly. You falling apart was such a turn on, well, these jeans aren't very comfortable right now."
"Let's see what we can do about that." she sat up and undid his belt and opened the button and fly of his jeans. Running her hand over his erection, she laughed a little, "What. No silk boxers today, just tighty-whities? Not that I'm complaining. Here." She tugged at the waistbands of his jeans and underwear. "Let's just slide these out of the way."
Rafe lifted his hips, flinching a bit at the strain on his ribs, but he wasn't going to stop her now. Not when she had such a determined...interested...gleam in her eye. He wanted to feel her lovely warm mouth around him. He helped her guide his underwear down over his erection.
She slid his jeans down, just past his buttocks. "Now. It's your turn to...hold...still." She pinned his hips down with her hands and licked the underside of his cock, using her full tongue firmly against it. He groaned in response.
Surprising him, she suddenly slid her mouth down over his penis, slowly sliding it in further as she relaxed her throat muscles. He shuddered with pleasure as she took him all the way in.
She slowly, painstakingly moved her mouth up and down on his cock. One hand stilled his hips, and the other went down to fondle his balls, running her fingernails gently over his flesh. His hips jerked and she lifted her mouth off of him. "Ah, ah. What did I ask you to do? Let's see if you can hold your hips still, Mr. Moretti."
Leaning back over him, she enveloped him with her mouth. His hand found her hair and tangled up in it stroking her head as she sucked on him. His eyes rolled back in his head at the sensations she was evoking.
She sped up her attentions and he found he could no longer keep his hips still. He bucked up to meet her mouth as she went down on him. The hand that was torturously fondling his balls snuck a finger behind them and rubbed his perineum, stimulating him further.
He groaned quietly as his thrusting quickened and became uneven. She could feel his balls start to tighten up, and became more vigorous in her licking and sucking. Another long, sotto voce groan sigh came from Rafe as he spent in her mouth. She swallowed and kept licking and sucking at him as he shuddered beneath her.
Pulling up the covers over them both, she put her head on his shoulder and listen to him catch his breath. "Now, I'd say it's bedtime for Mr. Moretti."
"Amen," Mr. Moretti responded on a long sigh.
Soon, they fell asleep, huddled closely together, half unclothed.
posted by Dace @ 9:57 PM
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